Mirai Pan
by aqua-illusions
Summary: Yaoi. Pretty mild Mirai Trunks/Gohan. A comical spoof of Disney's Peter Pan with the Z gang.
1. No way! It's you!

Hey everybody!   
  
Okay, this isn't a story about Pan from the Mirai timeline. It's Yaoi, nothing heavy   
though (I'm still too young for that, *wink*), It's a Mirai Trunks/Gohan.   
  
The inspiration for this is from the Boxer and Rice website at   
http://perso.wanadoo.fr/gohanxtrunks/ I highly suggest checking it out; there are some   
great ideas if your muse has run dry.  
  
This is challenge fic #6: The Peter Pan spoof. The cast of characters is as follows:  
  
Peter Pan – Mirai Trunks  
Tinkerbell – Vegeta-Bell  
Wendy – Gohan  
John and Michael (Wendy's brothers) – Chibi Trunks and Goten  
Captain Hook – Mr. Satan  
Smee – The Tenkaichi Budokai Announcer  
Hook's pirates – The monks from the Budokai  
  
I think you can pretty much figure out who everyone else is supposed to be, it's pretty   
obvious.  
  
I hope you enjoy it!  
  
Disclaimer: "We're fighters, not ballet dancers." -Vegeta  
  
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"Goku! We're going to be late for the party! Hurry up!" Chichi shrieked at her husband.  
  
"But Chichi, I can't find my favorite tie!" Goku whined helplessly.  
  
Just then Goten and Chibi Trunks come barreling down the stairs, sparring and   
pretending to sword fight.  
  
"HA! Take that you scurvy boatswain! Do you give up yet Mr. Satan?" cried Chibi   
Trunks as he attacked Goten.  
  
"Never! I'll get you for cuttin' off me hand, Mirai Trunks!" countered Goten, in an   
atrocious pirate accent.  
  
"You can't even come close to defeating me!" scoffed Chibi Trunks.  
  
"Oh yeah? I'll slit your gizzard, you insolent brat!" Goten crowed.  
  
"GOHAN!" screeched Chichi, "Get down here and get you brothers under control!"  
  
Gohan came down the stairs and was immediately clobbered by the two warring children.   
Chichi had finally found Goku's lost tie and was proceeding to tie it around her   
husband's neck, half-strangling him in the process.  
  
"BOYS! Your father and I are going out tonight! Behave and study hard! You are all   
going to have a big test when I get back, so you had better be prepared!" yelled Chichi.  
  
"But Mom, what about Mirai Trunks?" asked Goten.  
  
"What about him?" She said, turning to glare at her youngest son, not noticing the   
unhealthy shade of purple creeping across Goku's face.  
  
"Gohan found Mirai's Capsule Corps jacket!" Chibi Trunks said proudly.  
  
"There is no such thing as Mirai Trunks! Gohan! Stop filling your brothers' heads with   
that nonsense!" Chichi hollered, "Come on Goku! Time to go! Gohan, make sure that all   
you boys study hard!"  
  
With that final yell Chichi grabbed her semi-asphyxiated husband and stomped out the   
door.  
  
Goten gazed at Gohan tearfully, "Mirai Trunks isn't real?" he sniffled.  
  
"Of course he is kiddo, Mom just doesn't understand." Gohan replied gently.  
  
****************************************  
  
Gohan had tucked the children into bed, Chibi Trunks and Goten were lying sprawled out   
on the bed they shared, snoring uproariously. Gohan smiled at his two brothers and   
crawled into his own bed, but he didn't sleep. He knew that Mirai Trunks would come   
looking for the jacket, so he stayed awake and waited.  
  
***************************************  
  
"Damn it boy! We should just blast the house down! Stop wasting time crawling in   
through the window!"  
  
"Shut up Veggie!"  
  
"Don't call me that!" yelled a very irate Vegeta-Bell.  
  
Mirai Trunks just snorted as he concentrated on getting the window open quietly. He   
couldn't believe that he had lost his favorite Capsule Corps jacket, he had to get it back!   
Mirai grinned triumphantly as the tiny click signified that he had defeated the window   
lock.  
  
"About time" grumbled Vegeta-Bell as he floated into the window.  
  
Rolling his eyes, Mirai followed him through, only to crash directly into a cabinet.   
Swearing profusely, Mirai hopped wildly around the room trying to ease the throbbing in   
his stubbed toe. Unfortunately Gohan's bed abruptly stopped Mirai's dance of pain. Mirai   
suddenly found himself in quite a compromising position, tangled on top of a rather   
surprised Gohan.  
  
"Mirai! It's you! I knew you'd come. I found your jacket." Gohan yelled excitedly.  
  
Chibi Trunks and Goten began to regain consciousness, "It's Mirai Trunks!" they   
squealed running around in circles until they caught sight of Vegeta-Bell glaring at them.   
His arms were crossed over his chest as he glowered at the two boys. They stared at him   
in wonder.  
  
"No way!" Goten and Chibi Trunks gasped in unison, "Its Veggie!"  
  
"DON'T EVER CALL ME THAT!" Vegeta-Bell roared.  
  
Meanwhile Mirai had extracted himself from Gohan and was happily dancing around the   
room after being reunited with his jacket.  
  
"Boy! You've got your precious jacket, so let's go!" Vegeta-Bell demanded.  
  
"Take us with you," Gohan, Goten and Chibi Trunks begged.  
  
"Well, You need to able to fly, but don't worry, all it takes is a little fairy dust." Mirai   
said, turning to Vegeta-Bell.  
  
Vegeta-Bell cocked an eyebrow, "You have GOT to be kidding."  
  
"But Veggie. . ." Goten said, tears welling up in his eyes, "we need to be able to fly."  
  
Vegeta-Bell snorted, "don't call me that."  
  
"Now we'll never get to go to Capsule Corps land," Goten moaned sadly, "all because we   
can't fly and Veggie won't help us."  
  
Chibi Trunks whacked Goten in the back of his head, "You dope! We CAN fly!"  
  
Goten's tears immediately disappeared, "Oh Yeah . . ."  
  
Mirai jumped up into the air, "Okay then, let's go!" he yelled excitedly, grabbing   
Gohan's hand and leading him out the window. Gohan blushed slightly and grinned a   
little. Goten and Chibi Trunks swooped around pretending to be airplanes, while a   
grumbling Vegeta-Bell brought up the rear.   
  
Gohan couldn't believe his luck; here he was, going to Capsule Corps land with THE   
Mirai Trunks. Gohan had had a crush on Mirai ever since he was a little boy reading   
about Mirai's marvelous adventures.   
  
Gohan couldn't help but smirk a little bit as he squeezed Mirai's hand tighter.   
  
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Okay! Chapter #1 is finished! *happy dance* Let me know what you think! Review!   
*Grin* By the way, if anyone wants to see a picture of Vegeta-Bell, say so in your review   
and leave your e-mail address, and I'll send it to you.  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	2. Excellent Plan

Okay, I admit, I totally could not resist updating on Friday the 13th. So, yeah, here we go with chapter #2.  
  
Oh, for y'all who requested Vegeta-Bell pics, I'm very sorry, but we are experiencing technical difficulties. Okay, actually, like a dork, I forgot my disk at my mom's house, so I won't get it back for another couple days. Sorry again, but you will get them soon!  
  
Disclaimer: "I'm no ordinary candy, I'm a jawbreaker, the strongest candy there is!" -Vegetto.  
  
On with the show!  
  
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Mr. Satan sat dejectedly on his ship. He stewed in thought while the Tenkaichi Budokai Announcer danced around with the pirate-monks. "If only I could find Mirai's hideout, then I could surround him and show him why Mr. Satan is the strongest man in the world!" Mr. Satan growled to himself. "But where could his hideout be . . ." Suddenly he snapped and stood up, "That's it! Those Nameks! They'll know where Mirai is!" He shouted. The Announcer and all the pirate-monks were totally astounded by the brilliance of their leader, who else but the famous Mr. Satan could come up with a plan like that?  
  
"That's a great idea Mr. Satan," said the Announcer, "we can kidnap Princess Dende-Lily! Then we can ransom her . . . er . . . him . . . it back for Mirai's location."  
  
"Excellent plan," said Mr. Satan, flashing his victory sign and barking out cheesy laughter, "Glad I thought of it."  
  
"But it's not fair to kidnap someone innocent like that and use them for ransom," said a random pirate-monk. All the others turned to glare at him.  
  
"Not fair! Not fair!" Mr. Satan shrieked, "Was it fair when Mirai cut off my hand and left me to be eaten by the crocodile Cell!"  
  
"Good thing Cell swallowed those two jinzouningen alarm clocks so we can hear him ticking whenever he comes near," said the Announcer soothingly.  
  
Abruptly one of the pirate-monks ran over and said, "Mr. Satan sir! Mirai has been spotted!"  
  
"What! Where?" sputtered Mr. Satan.  
  
"Off starboard bow Captain!" the pirate-monk replied.  
  
"Well don't just stand there! Alert the crew! Load the cannons! Shoot him out of the sky!" cried Mr. Satan.  
  
"Aye aye, sir!"  
  
***************************************  
  
Mirai and crew were flying over Capsule Corps land, slowly circling down for a landing.  
  
"Oh Mirai! It's just like I always imagined it!" exclaimed Gohan.  
  
"Look over there! There's a Namek tribe!" Goten gasped.  
  
"Hey, look Goten, real pirates!" Chibi Trunks replied. As Chibi Trunks and Goten were admiring the pirate ship, the cannons fired straight towards them.  
  
"Look out!" Mirai cried, "Quick Veggie, take Gohan and the boys down to the hideout. Tell the Lost Girls I'll be back soon. I'm gonna try and draw their fire while you escape." With that Mirai dived down and pulled out his sword, calling out to Mr. Satan and demanding a fight with him.  
  
Vegeta-Bell grumbled, "Damn boy, telling me what to do." As he flew Vegeta- Bell was struck with a fabulous plot for vengeance. His frown slowly transformed into a devious smirk as he led the boys to the hideout.  
  
Revenge is indeed sweet.  
  
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Vegeta-Bell swooped down and into the huge, bright yellow dome-shaped hideout. Gohan and crew were only a few minutes behind, so Vegeta-Bell had to act fast in implementing his plan. He flew over to where the Lost Girls were playing.  
  
"Veggie! You're back!" Bra squealed gleefully.  
  
Marron and Pan also stopped what they were doing and welcomed the disgruntled saiya-jin-fairy.  
  
"Don't call me that," Vegeta-Bell said, but with none of his usual anger, "Look Brats, I have orders from Mirai. There are some boys on their way here, and when they get here you get to play with them . . . however you want."  
  
The girls' eyes got wide. "You mean . . ." started to ask Pan.  
  
"Yes" Vegeta-Bell cut her off, smirking.  
  
His smirk was mirrored on all three of the Lost Girls' faces, "Okay," said Marron, glancing at her cohorts, "We must prepare."  
  
Vegeta-Bell's sneer grew to disturbing proportions as he watched the Lost Girls get ready for the boys' arrival.  
  
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Review baby! You know you want to! The more the merrier!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	3. Agonizing Torture

Hey people! Thanks to all the reviewers out there, I love ya all! So, um, I don't really have anything to say, but having an author's note at the beginning is like a tradition. So I'll stop blabbing now and get on with the fic!  
  
Disclaimer: "That pose is not fit for a saiya-jin warrior, it's too prissy". -Vegeta  
  
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Gohan, Goten and Chibi Trunks finally touched down at Capsule Corps, they took a minute to catch their breath and cautiously stepped up to the door. Chibi Trunks and Goten had a quick fight to decide who would get to ring the doorbell, but they were thwarted by Gohan who stepped around them and rung it himself.  
  
The door swung open to reveal three adorable girls with Vegeta-Bell hovering over their shoulders.  
  
"Hello," They chorused in a singsong voice. The blue haired one stepped forward, "I'm Bra, and these are my friends Marron and Pan." She said pointing to each of the girls in turn, "We're the Lost Girls."  
  
Pan looked at Gohan and crew, "So you guys are the ones Mirai sent over, huh?" she asked.  
  
"Um, yeah, that would be us . . ." Gohan replied nervously. The Lost Girls exchanged a glance and slowly started circling around him and his brothers.  
  
"Well this'll be perfect," said Marron.  
  
"What'll be perfect?" asked Chibi Trunks, unnerved by the way that the girls were staring at him.  
  
The Lost Girls began to smirk. Bra snickered sadistically, "We are going to give you three . . . MAKEOVERS!"  
  
Gohan, Goten and Trunks shrunk away from the Girls in horror; they stood back to back, belatedly realizing that they were surrounded.  
  
"Don't worry, this wont hurt a bit," assured Pan as she began to attack Chibi Trunks with a lash curler.  
  
Vegeta-Bell watched the scene before him, laughing manically as the boys were tortured by the innocent-seeming Lost Girls.  
  
************************************  
  
Mirai Trunks touched down at the hideout, he was tired and glad to be home. He was ready to kick up his feet and watch a little TV, maybe with Gohan snuggled up next to him. He was wondering how enthusiastic Gohan would be about that idea when he opened the door. He was completely unprepared for the scene that greeted him.  
  
Gohan, Goten, and Chibi Trunks glanced pleadingly over at Mirai, begging him to end their humiliating torture. Vegeta-Bell was snickering madly; he seemed to be highly amused that Gohan and crew could easily be mistaken for cheep whores. Gohan looked very attractive with his garish lipstick and eye shadow. The blush on his cheeks matched perfectly with the numerous fluorescent pink bows that adorned his stylish new hairdo. Goten and Chibi Trunks were extremely fetching with their freshly curled eyelashes, courtesy of Pan, and their own lovely makeup jobs. Mirai bit his lip desperately trying not to laugh, but he failed miserably and burst into a fit of hysterics.  
  
As soon as Mirai got himself under control, he turned on the three Lost Girls. "I thought we had a discussion about this," he said sternly, "giving makeovers to innocent people is not a nice thing to do."  
  
"But Veggie said that you said we could!" Bra protested.  
  
Mirai turned to glare at the diminutive saiya-jin-fairy. Vegeta-Bell froze mid-snicker. "Vegeta-Bell! How could you! You knew I wanted you to lead Gohan and his brothers here to protect them, not torture them!" Mirai screamed.  
  
Vegeta-Bell scowled, "You never said that they shouldn't have makeovers."  
  
"That's it! Get out! You are now officially exiled for a whole day!" Mirai ordered.  
  
"Insolent Brat, you can't order me around! I am the prince of all saiya-jin- fairies! The likes of you is not fit to wallow in the dirt I could so easily crush you into! I am leaving you now to go torment someone more worthy" Vegeta-Bell griped as he flittered out of the room.  
  
Mirai sighed and turned to Gohan, "I'm sorry you had to go through that, Veggie has a huge mean streak for such a small body." He said, "The Lost Girls are nice, even if they can be devious little monsters when they want to be."  
  
Gohan grinned at Mirai, trying futilely to rub off some of the thick layers of powder adorning his face.  
  
"I like the makeup, the pink really suits you." Mirai said with a wink.  
  
At that comment, Gohan turned a striking shade of said color.  
  
Mirai then turned to Goten and Chibi Trunks, "You two go get cleaned up, while I kidnap your older brother and show him around."  
  
"Okay!" Goten shouted as he bounced over to the bathroom, dragging Chibi Trunks behind him.  
  
Next Mirai glared at the Lost Girls, "You had better be civil while I'm gone, no more torturing anybody, got it?"  
  
"Yup!" The three Girls chorused.  
  
"Good, now you five play nice." He warned sternly.  
  
"We will," Bra agreed.  
  
"We promise to be good." Pan said reassuringly.  
  
"Alright then, Gohan, let's go," Mirai said sauntering out the door.  
  
Gohan blushed as he followed Mirai, trying very hard not to ogle Mirai's butt.  
  
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Wahoo! I want to sneak a peak at Mirai's butt too! *Grin*  
  
Review! Let me know what you think!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	4. At the Lagoon

Alrighty! Thanks to all those wonderful people who reviewed! You're beautiful!  
  
By the way, because Chaney said so, Dende-Lily's real name is Dende-Lion. He just decided to get in touch with his Namek roots, and with their whole agricultural history, he decided to re-name himself after his favorite flower. After all the legal proceedings and hassle, Dende-Lily belatedly realized that his old name could be cleverly made into a pun of "Dandelion", unfortunately his lawyers had gone through such an ordeal to get his name changed in the first place, they told him that he was stuck with Dende-Lily. The poor Namek princess fell into a depression for a while, but the he realized that he liked lilies more than dandelions anyway, and that Aqua was really too stupid to get the whole Tiger-Lily, Dende-Lion joke by the first try and had to think about it for a minute. So that's why his name is now Dende-Lily.  
  
Okay, after that whole long explanation, it's ficcy time!  
  
Disclaimer: "Ugh. Got my cape soggy." - Piccolo  
  
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Mirai grinned at Gohan as the two of them touched down at a beautiful lagoon. "I thought it might be fun to take a swim," he said, "and this should help clean you off."  
  
Mirai stripped off his beloved jacket, followed by his shirt and pants and dived into the water. Gohan was practically drooling to see Mirai without a shirt on, but he took off his outer layers of clothing and jumped in too.  
  
They swam around for a while until Mirai decided that Gohan needed to wash off his makeup-encrusted face. He splashed a huge wave right on top of Gohan. Gohan stood dripping in shock for a minute, and then he launched himself at the unsuspecting Mirai, crying out at the top of his lungs, "This means war!"  
  
They wrestled together, splattering water everywhere until Mirai managed to pin Gohan underneath him. Their faces were so close together; Gohan gazed up into Mirai's eyes. Closer . . . closer . . . until their lips were so close together, he could almost feel the heat radiating from Mirai. Gohan couldn't take it any longer, he closed the remaining distance between them and kissed Mirai, hard. They kissed for what felt like hours, tangled up together in the middle of the lagoon.  
  
Suddenly Mirai jerked his head back, "What was that?" he asked.  
  
"Hmm?" Gohan's mind was far too muddled from his recent activity to register anything wrong.  
  
"That sound, I think it's Mr. Satan's ship." Mirai motioned Gohan to follow quietly. They climbed up over the cliff surrounding the lagoon. Mirai quickly peeked up over the top and ducked back down. "He's got princess Dende-Lily," he whispered, "we've got to rescue him"  
  
"Him?" Gohan asked, perplexed "Isn't he a princess?"  
  
"Dende-Lily is the princess of the Namek tribe, they're A-sexual, so we just assign them a gender specific pronoun." Mirai explained. Gohan nodded in understanding.  
  
"Let's go sneak over and find out what they're up to." Mirai proposed, already moving to creep closer. Gohan sighed reluctantly, but it was really too late to resume their make out session, so he'd have to follow and help liberate Dende-Lily.  
  
******************************************  
  
Mr. Satan allowed himself a quiet cackle; his plan was working perfectly. Soon Dende-Lily would crack and then he would find Mirai Trunks' precious hideout.  
  
The Tenkaichi Budokai Announcer was tying up poor Dende-Lily to a pole in the shallow water, if the Namek princess didn't spill the beans by high tide, he would drown.  
  
"Tell me Princess, where is Mirai's hideout?" Mr. Satan demanded.  
  
Dende-Lily glared at him, but said nothing.  
  
"I am the strongest man in the world! You will give me the location of Capsule Corps!" Mr. Satan shrieked, but Dende-Lily remained firm.  
  
"Fine. You'll crack," Mr. Satan declared triumphantly, "It's only a matter of time."  
  
Mirai and Gohan watched this whole scene, Mirai decided that it had been long enough and whispered to Gohan, "Stay here, I'm gonna go rescue Dende- Lily."  
  
Mirai flew out from the lagoon and hovered over the pirate ship. "Mr. Satan!" He called.  
  
The Announcer and several of the pirate-monks were startled by his presence and ran around screeching, "Oh no! It's Mirai!"  
  
"Gaahh, come down here and fight like a man, or are you afraid to fight the strongest man in the world!" bellowed Mr. Satan. Mirai started giggling at the poses Mr. Satan was going through as he made this declaration.  
  
"If you don't surrender, your Namek friend over there will drown." Mr. Satan threatened.  
  
"Um, well, I hate to burst your bubble, but it takes a couple hours for the tide to get that high . . ." Mirai pointed out.  
  
"Ha! You're just bluffing because you're terrified by my might!" Mr. Satan hollered.  
  
A faint ticking sound floated on the wind, slowly getting louder with each passing second. Mr. Satan froze and began turning a pale green color, "I-I- It's C-Cell!" He stuttered. The frenzy of pirate-monks ran around in circles on the deck of the ship, horrified by the sound of the approaching crocodile.  
  
Mirai took advantage of the distraction and swooped over to Dende-Lily, untying him and grabbing the poor Namek as he flew back to Gohan.  
  
"Okay, Dende-Lily, let's get you back to your tribe," said Gohan as the three of them blasted off toward the Namek camp.  
  
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Heehee! Bishie make-out session! Yay! Okay, so if any of you have read the actual challenge on the website, it also asks for a spoof of "Why is the Red Man Red", the very un-PC song, to "Why are the Namek green?" I tried to do the best that I could to change the song, unfortunately I am considerably less than talented at song perversion. Not only that, but I haven't heard the song for at least ten years, and don't know the melody. So anyway, my attempts have failed miserably, but I still really want to put in the song. That's where y'all come in. I have decided to do a contest to see if anyone would write the lyrics for me. If you do, I'll give you proper credit and some sort of reward. I could write a fic of your choice, or do a happy dance, maybe write an ode in your honor? So if you want to do it, let me know. The deadline is whenever I get around to posting the chapter that I'll need it in, which is probably the one after next, so maybe two or three weeks. So pleasepleaseplease help! Thanks a lot, and don't forget to review!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	5. Sacred Namek Ritual

Hi everybody! Thanks to all who reviewed, and an extra BIG thanks to Android 71 and Hervé! You guys were a HUGE help. The Namek song will be in the next chapter and I hope everyone will like it!  
  
Disclaimer: "Look Vegeta! People popcorn!" -Goku  
  
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Chibi Trunks screeched as Goten chased him around the bathroom wielding a washcloth. The Lost Girls sat in the doorway, watching the two brothers' antics.  
  
"Get away!" Chibi Trunks wailed as Goten closed in.  
  
"Come on, you don't want to have this makeup on forever do you? Let me finish getting it off." Goten reasoned.  
  
"Nononononono!" Came Chibi Trunks' cries, muffled by Goten's firm scrubbing.  
  
"There, was that so bad?" Goten teased, as the two of them dried off.  
  
"Yes." muttered Chibi Trunks grumpily.  
  
"So, what do you guys want to do next?" asked Marron.  
  
"Let's go visit Mr. Piccolo!" suggested Pan eagerly.  
  
"Yeah," agreed Marron, "we haven't seen him in a while."  
  
"Then it's settled, we'll go to the Namek camp." Bra said firmly.  
  
"Yay! Real Nameks, this is so cool." exclaimed Goten excitedly.  
  
Chibi Trunks just rolled his eyes.  
  
*********************************  
  
The Lost Girls led Goten and Chibi Trunks from Capsule Corps hideout to the Namek village. When they got close enough Bra called for silence.  
  
"It's a tradition," Marron explained to the two boys.  
  
"Yeah, we always try to sneak up on Mr. Piccolo," Pan agreed.  
  
Chibi Trunks and Goten quickly consented to the Lost Girls' mischief.  
  
Bra took the lead and beckoned for the others to follow. They crawled behind the huts outskirting the village. The Nameks were celebrating their daily sacred lunch ritual, which involved a large bonfire and chanting. As Chibi Trunks and Goten edged closer with the Girls, they were overjoyed to discover that the ritual bonfire was in fact, a giant barbeque pit.  
  
Pan and Marron sneaked ahead so they could surround the village center and take the Nameks by surprise. Unfortunately they barely got ten feet before several large Nameks jumped into their path.  
  
"Damn!" Bra yelled. "How did you know we were here?"  
  
The Namek in charge smirked. "You will have to be much quieter than that to sneak up on us."  
  
"Shut up Nail," Pan grumbled.  
  
"Don't look so sad Girls, you have perfect timing, the barbeque is about to start." Nail said sympathetically.  
  
"Barbeque! Yes!" Chibi Trunks and Goten crowed, as they leapt around, following the Nameks towards the bonfire.  
  
***********************  
  
Mirai and Gohan circled down for a landing at the Namek village, with Dende- Lily in tow. Gohan's nose twitched, something smelled GOOD.  
  
"Mmm, looks like we're just in time for the daily barbeque ritual." Mirai said, "Namek Gods demand that they do the cooking ceremony every day, but it doesn't matter what they do with the food afterwards. Nameks don't eat, so I'm sure they won't mind if we polish off their meal."  
  
Gohan tried not to drool at the smells wafting past. His stomach growled in a loud reminder that he hadn't eaten in too long. Two answering tummy rumbles came echoing from the village center.  
  
"I know those stomachs! Goten and Chibi Trunks must be here too. Come on Mirai, with those two we'll be lucky if there's any food left within a ten mile radius." Gohan said grabbing Mirai and Dende-Lily and running towards the wonderful smells.  
  
*******************  
  
"Mr. Piccolo!" The Lost Girls shrieked latching onto the poor Namek chief, "We missed you!"  
  
Piccolo almost smiled, "Hello Girls, back for more food?"  
  
Marron grinned, "Yup! We came here to introduce you to our new friends, but food is good too."  
  
Piccolo noticed the two boys standing behind the Girls. "Hello you two, don't worry, I don't bite." He said to them, "You're welcome to all the food you can eat, we always seem to have an abundance. By the way, have any of you seen Dende-Lily?"  
  
"No, Why?" Asked Pan.  
  
Piccolo sighed, "He's been gone awhile, I'm starting to worry about the kid."  
  
"I'm sure he's just wondered off again," reassured Bra.  
  
"Hey Goten, I bet I can eat more than you can!" Chibi Trunks challenged, looking at the heaps and heaps of perfectly cooked sacred Namek food.  
  
Goten tried to stop drooling long enough to respond, "No way! I eat way more than you ever could."  
  
"Is that a fact?" Chibi Trunks asked skeptically.  
  
Bra snorted at the two boys, "We Lost Girls are champions, we could eat you out of house and home before you finished your first bite!"  
  
"Really?" asked Goten, awed.  
  
Chibi Trunks dope slapped him, "No way, they're just bluffing you dope," turning to the Girls he declared "We challenge you three to an eating contest!"  
  
Marron scoffed, "We accept, losers have to scrub the floors at the hideout."  
  
Pan made a face, "But Marron! Those floors haven't been cleaned in forever!"  
  
"So we had better not lose then." Bra advised.  
  
"Okay fine!" Chibi Trunks yelled.  
  
Just then Gohan came running toward the sacred barbeque pit dragging Mirai and Dende-Lily in his wake.  
  
"Food! Glorious wonderful food!" Gohan cried.  
  
Piccolo saw Dende-Lily and grabbed him by the ankle and held him upside- down, "Where have you been?" He demanded, "Do you know how worried everyone was about you!"  
  
"Chill Mr. Piccolo," Mirai said, "Dende-Lily got kidnapped by Captain Dumbass."  
  
A vein bulged out of Piccolo's forehead, "You got kidnapped by Mr. Satan! You are never allowed to leave the village again without Nail as an escort!"  
  
Dende-Lily grumbled as Piccolo dropped him back on the ground.  
  
Gohan unexpectedly grabbed Mirai in a big hug, "Look at the food!"  
  
"Yeah Gohan, I know, let's eat," Mirai said.  
  
"No! We're having an eating contest, and you two will spoil it all." Chibi Trunks complained.  
  
Gohan's eyes filled up with tears and his stomach protested loudly, "No food?" He asked pitifully.  
  
"We are entering the contest too" Mirai declared.  
  
"Fine," said Pan, "we already decided that the losers have to scrub the floors at Capsule Corps."  
  
Mirai turned green, "Ewww, those floors are so dirty."  
  
"Don't worry! We can't lose against these children!" Gohan asserted.  
  
"Ok," Mirai said hesitantly.  
  
"Alright!" Exclaimed Chibi Trunks and Goten joyfully.  
  
"Mr. Piccolo, you be the judge, okay?" Bra asked, flashing him her dreaded cute look.  
  
Piccolo withered at that look and consented.  
  
*******************  
  
Vegeta-Bell scowled angrily as he watched the events at the Namek camp. He ducked back around the hut he was hiding behind. Those brats! How dare they not invite him to the eating contest. Ha! They were probably afraid to lose to him.  
  
Vegeta-Bell was so caught up in his little internal rant that he didn't even notice the tranquilizer dart until it hit him smack dab in the butt. His growl quickly faded to a groan and then to silence as he dropped to the ground, the dart half as large as his entire body still sticking up out of him.  
  
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Heehee, Veggie got shot in the tuchis! Poor baby!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	6. What Makes the Nameks Green?

Hey everybody! Thanks to all the reviewers out there! And here it is, in this very chapter, the long awaited, joyfully anticipated Namek Song! It could not have been possible without the wonderful song perversion skills of Android 71 and Hervé! So this chapter is dedicated to those brilliant people!  
  
Disclaimer: "Smell Buu's breath, minty fresh!" -Buu  
  
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Mr. Satan was angry. Mirai had gotten away! If Cell hadn't interrupted and almost eaten the entire pirate ship, than Mirai Pan would be history by now. Mr. Satan growled, who did that punk think he was? Going up again the strongest man in the world!  
  
The Tenkaichi Budokai Announcer ran over to Mr. Satan, interrupting his thoughts. "Captain!" he bubbled, "We have a visitor! Mr. Buu is back!"  
  
"Buu? Wonderful! Bring him to me!" Mr. Satan ordered.  
  
The Announcer returned a second later with the large pink blob.  
  
"Buu!" Mr. Satan happily addressed his dear friend, "How have you been?"  
  
"Buu good!" The pink thing squealed, "Buu bring you present!"  
  
"A present? For me?" Mr. Satan asked, wondering what it could be.  
  
Buu nodded and pulled out a tiny cage with a familiar disgruntled saiya-jin fairy, still out cold. "Me find him and shoot with tranquilizer. Me bring to you, maybe you eat?"  
  
Mr. Satan glared at the small body and recognized it immediately. "Why I know that little bug-thing! That's Mirai's cohort! Vegetable!"  
  
"Don't call me that!" the still-unconscious Vegeta-Bell grumbled in his sleep.  
  
"Ahh, Buu! This is perfect! We'll hold this little guy and interrogate him about the location of Capsule Corps headquarters." Mr. Satan declared.  
  
Buu gave an evil little chuckle. Mr. Satan was always planning something fun.  
  
************************  
  
Goten groaned. He had to win! He couldn't let Chibi Trunks down!   
  
The poor little guy tried desperately to raise his fork to his mouth one more time, but he was sooo full; he felt like he was about to pop. Just. . . one . . . more. . . bite. Unfortunately Goten didn't make it and collapsed unconscious into his plate.  
  
Gohan was still going strong as he grabbed another plate and dug in. Both Trunks were beginning to weaken as they struggled to force down more food. Marron had joined Goten face down in her plate, down for the count. Bra was half-heartedly scooping up more and Pan was turning green around the edges looking at how much more food there was.  
  
Ten minutes later everyone except Gohan was sprawled out in various states of consciousness, moaning and holding their overstuffed stomachs. Piccolo declared the Gohan/Mirai Trunks team the winners.  
  
Chibi Trunks looked over at Pan, who still had an unhealthy green tint. "Hey Pan," he said, "You're starting to look like a Namek!"  
  
Bra piped up, "Hey Mr. Piccolo, is that why the Namek are green? Because they ate too much?"  
  
Piccolo sighed, "Well that may not be far from the truth, there are several ancient theories. If you'd like to know, there is a song about it."  
  
"Oh pleasepleaseplease sing it for us Mr. Piccolo!" The Girls begged.  
  
The Namek chief cleared his throat and glared at Nail and Dende-Lily to join in. The three Nameks stood and prepared to sing [to the tune of "What makes the red man red?"]:  
  
"Hana mana ganda   
What makes the Nameks green?   
What makes the Nameks green?   
Let's go back one million years   
To the very first Namek Prince   
He ate a dodgy custard pie   
And we've all been very sick since.  
  
Hana mana ganda   
Hana mana ganda   
We translate for you   
"Hana" means what "mana" means   
And "ganda" means that too   
  
Hana mana ganda   
Why don't the Nameks eat?  
Why don't the Nameks eat?   
Let's go back one million years   
To that dodgy custard pie   
If you ate a dodgy pie like that   
Then surely you'd know why.  
  
Hana mana ganda  
When did he first howl, "Argghhhh!!!"   
When did he first howl, "Argghhhh!!!"   
Long time ago, Great Piccolo says   
When he first heard Popo guffaw   
He turned around, howling "Argghhhh!!!"   
As he saw Kami dressed as squaw.   
  
Hana mana ganda  
If you don't like these theories   
On why Nameks skin is green  
Then we'll go back one million years   
To the a-sexual Namek Prince   
He saw these two boys make out   
And we've been green with envy since.  
  
Hana mana ganda   
You've got it from Piccolo   
It's not dye or chlorine  
No matter what's been written or said   
Now you know why the Nameks are green"  
  
Everyone clapped and cheered at the wonderful performance. The three Namek blushed purple at the praise.  
  
Suddenly the Lost Girls remembered the bet they had lost and motioned to Goten and Chibi Trunks to sneak away slowly. Unluckily for them, Mirai had also remembered the bet and grabbed them before they could escape.  
  
"Oh no, you all aren't going to get out of it that easily. We're going back to the hideout right now so you five can scrub that floor spotless!" Mirai said.  
  
"Thanks Mr. Piccolo!" Gohan and Mirai said as they dragged the others back to Capsule Corps.  
  
************************************  
  
"Damn it! Why did we have to go and make this bet in the first place!" Bra yelled, angrily brandishing her mop.  
  
"Yeah!" replied Goten, who was using a little sponge to scrub away the layers of grime that had been built up over the years. "This isn't fair!"  
  
Chibi Trunks snorted and toyed around with his broom.  
  
Goten glared at Chibi Trunks and threw his sponge at him, accidentally missing and hitting Pan. Pan was outraged and grabbed the scrub brush from Marron and flung it at Goten, but she missed and hit Bra. Bra squealed and chucked a bar of soap at Pan, but hit Chibi Trunks instead.  
  
Soon it had escalated into a huge soapy brawl.  
  
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Okie-dokie! Hope y'all liked it, review and tell me what ya think!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


	7. Cantankerous!

Hey y'all! Okay, I was utterly ashamed when I read Chaney's review. She said that she kept forgetting that this was a yaoi story. I realized that I had been so busy re-crating a funny, DBZ-ified version of Peter Pan that I had lost my focus on the love story between Gohan and Mirai. I'll try to bring our two lovers' relationship back into the spotlight, but I'm not too good at the mushy stuff. Hopefully I'll be able to make it up to everybody in future chapters. Anyways, here we go. Enjoy!  
  
Disclaimer: "Is that fusion or a junior high prom?" -Kuririn  
  
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Light poured in through the window, flowing down the floor and splashing across one small, petulant form. Vegeta-Bell grumbled and curled up into a ball. Damn sun, always coming up too early. He was trying to sleep, damn it! Why the hell couldn't it go away and come back later. He grumpily sat up and stretched. "Boy!" He shouted, "Where's my breakfast!" He was greeted with no response. Growling, the saiya-jin-fairy made his way over to the kitchen, only to crash into some rather obnoxious metal bars. Swearing abundantly, Vegeta-Bell took a minute to study his surroundings, quickly ascertaining that he was not at home.  
  
Upon seeing Vegeta-Bell in a slightly less than unconscious state, Mr. Satan ran over toward the unhappily caged grouch and bellowed, "You! You're Mirai's little pet, Vegetable, aren't you! I've got you now! Tell me where Capsule Corps is!"  
  
Very, very bad move. The disgruntled Vegeta-Bell was NOT a morning person. Easily bending the metal bars, he promptly stormed out of the cage and launched into his day by beating the living daylights out of the fool who dared to refer to him, the prince of all saiya-jin-fairies, as a pet.  
  
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Vegeta-Bell looked down at the mangled form of Mr. Satan, smacking his hands together, satisfied at a job well done. Smirking, he proceeded with the traditional saiya-jin-fairy royal victory dance.  
  
Mr. Satan, however did not seem to be able to recognize when enough was enough. "Tell me where Capsule Corps is!" He demanded, even though he was currently in a broken heap on the floor.  
  
Vegeta-Bell halted the interpretive dancing re-enactment of his glowing victory. He glared down at Mr. Satan, "You idiot! How can you not find Capsule Corps? It's a huge bright yellow dome in the middle of the forest on a very sparsely populated island!" This statement was immediately followed by a long half-mumbled string of insults. After Vegeta-Bell had finished his rant he gave Mr. Satan one more kick for good measure, and then stormed out the door and off the ship.  
  
The small pile of Mr. Satan grinned, he finally had the location of Mirai's headquarters.  
  
*****************************************  
  
Gohan sighed contentedly. Life was good. His stomach was full of scrumptious food and his arms were full of scrumptious Mirai. On this note, he kissed Mirai again. It probably would have been a lot more romantic if the two of them had not been completely soaked seconds later by a flood of soapy water.  
  
A small head popped out from the doorway of the kitchen. "Oops! Sorry 'bout that!" Pan said with a grin and a wave. "I missed. I guess my aim's a bit off today."  
  
Unfortunately for her, Bra didn't have the same problem. A wet sponge sailed neatly through the air, its perfect parabolic path suddenly halting as it collided solidly with the back of Pan's head. Pan yelped and charged back into the kitchen after Bra.  
  
Mirai sighed exasperatedly. Never a quiet moment. He glumly wrung out his perfectly purple hair and turned back to the object of his affections. Gohan was completely coated with soap bubbles. Mirai groaned and grabbed Gohan's hand, dragging him along into the kitchen.  
  
*******************  
  
Mirai flung open the door to reveal a huge sudsy mess of what used to be the kitchen. None of the usual surfaces were visible beneath the frothy, murky flood. Cleaning supplies flew through the air with wild abandon. Gohan ducked, narrowly avoiding decapitation from a wayward bottle of dishwashing liquid. Goten came hurtling out of the bubbles to bean Mirai with a mop. Marron was hot on Goten's heels, menacingly wielding a scrub brush. They both darted around, giggling madly, only to immediately disappear back into the foamy chaos from whence they came.  
  
Gohan and Mirai looked at the whole scene hopelessly, praying for something, ANYTHING, to end this madness. Luckily for them, their prayers were answered, in the form of Vegeta-Bell, who had just flown in the window.  
  
Vegeta-Bell took one look at the desecration of his beloved kitchen and shot into action. He grabbed the pull-out sprayer faucet from the sink and quickly hosed down the entire room, shooting everyone and everything indiscriminately. The clean water washed out all the soap and dirt. Soon all that was left were five thouroughly saturated, yet squeaky-clean children, and two sopping wet, yet dead sexy guys, and one cantankerous saiya-jin-fairy (and a partridge in a pair tree).  
  
Chibi Trunks looked around. "Well," he said, sniffing critically, "at least the floors are clean."  
  
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What a way to wash the floor! If only my chores would end up being so fun. I think cantankerous is now my new favorite word. Please review!  
  
-aqua_illusion 


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